Tag Archives: death

What do I deserve!


What did I deserve after all the hard work I had done?
What do I deserve after all the hard work I have done?
What will I deserve after all the hard work I will have done by the time of my death?
I was talking about all the hard work; but, for whom, for what purpose? What was the nature of that hard work? If my hard work causes or does harm to other living beings? What should I deserve?
I am asking myself!
I need to question myself.

NASA and the blood-stained Missiles


NASA and the blood-stained missiles

NASA and the blood-stained missiles

The ancient mariner had killed the Albatross. Later he repented.

What happened afterward? The fiery storm damaged the ship. The monster waves drowned the children.
They tried to escape from the fire-spitting missiles. They tried to escape from the claw of death. The children from Afghanistan, Libya, Syria, Iraq, tried to escape the fire, destruction, and death.
But, tell me one truth. How did the US military build the pin-pointed missiles? It flew a thousand miles and struck the hideouts of the terrorists in Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria, and Libya.
Sometimes, they fell on the wrong targets. Houses, where children were playing.
And, boom! The cloak of darkness.
Geodetic or geometric data fired the salvo.
What is that? It is scientific data. The scientific community needs it. Measuring the shape and size of this planet is difficult. The geodetic or geometric data helps us.
But, the US military builds the missiles, using the same data. The published declassified documents tell us the inside story.
NASA did not want this. Tight cooperation between NASA and the US military agencies allowed them to use the same geodetic data.
NASA wanted for scientific endeavor. Military wanted them for building missiles, killing terrorists and common people at same breath.

NASA wanted documents to remain unclassified. So, they bickered and bickered. The conscience roared at the silent ears.
The US missiles used the NASA technology to build the missiles. NASA used their cameras to photograph the moonwalk.
Pause. Human civilization.
Who cares?

Spies in the Skies

Fifteen Rules that can Kill your Killer Impulses


Sometimes an indefinitely large force of brief duration produces a finite momentum. In Physics, it is called “Impulse”.

This strange bond between indefinition and the terminable whole gamut of emotions, from happiness to sorrow and back, seems fuzzy, abstruse, and inscrutable. Although beyond our comprehension, it takes full control and forces us to do things that we don’t do in general with enough reasoning power.

When we act on impulse, we don’t understand we’re acting on impulse. It’s tragic but true. Our logical sense fails us; it’s a complete failure, irreversible; and it allows animal heat take the steering of our mind to drive us to a dark corridor where we don’t want to step in, not even in our bad dreams.

The ‘impulse’ comes, a sudden appearance; it forces us, instructs us-do this, do that and we obey without any protest. An all-pervasive, momentary blindness consumes us, like fire, destroying our logical senses, reasoning power for a brief duration.

After producing a finite momentum that ‘indefinitely large force’ suddenly disappears leaving us in a state of complete disarray and a usual disaster follows.

We buy something on impulse, splurging money. Later we repent-oh, we could have spent that money in a more meaningful way. But it’s too late!

We cannot suppress our sexual impulse and later we either repent alone or get punished somehow or other.

What can I do? What can you do? What can we do?

You may try these simple rules in your life.

  1. Slow down. What’s all the hurry for? Just refuse to be hurried into a decision. Remember, only devils are in hurry and they always provoke you to take a decision in such a hurry that you must mistake.
  2. Remember rule number one again. Slowing down, or planning in well advance doesn’t mean an unwillingness to work or make any effort. This is wisdom.
  3. Ask yourself one question: am I in full control of myself? Try to control only yourself, not others. At the same time don’t let others control you or your decisions.
  4. Anger and libido are silent killers. If you let them rule over you, you are away from the correct path. However, this is the way people or animals naturally behave or react.
    What we can do to avoid unpleasant situations? Remember rule number one.
  5. Releasing anger and libido in private, alone is the perfectly sane solution. Go to the toilet, close the door, be alone and vent your anger, frustration, animal heat-alone. Yes, alone. Not in public. This world is a stage and we all are actors. I hope you get the clue.
  6. Technology is going to change this world in the coming years and yes, this change will affect many things including our lifestyle. Learn technology that suits your mindset.
  7. There is three categories-a basic user who knows the basic operations and aware of security breaches, a front-end developer and aware of security breaches, and finally, a programmer who knows technology upside down. Learn it at your pace. Remember, when the outside world is changing you must take part, otherwise, you will lag behind.
  8. Knowledge is your real investment and your true friend in difficult times.
  9. Whatever you do, a bank job, hotel job, maybe you are in sales and services, whatever your profession is, besides that try to find out the real passion that gives you real pleasure when you are alone.
  10. In most cases, people are not happy with what he does as a professional. So, find out your true passion and plan to give it at least ten years to master the subject. It will save you one day when your unhappiness as a professional reaches the peak and you think about leaving the job. However, by that time you are in a position to take the harshest decision of your life.
  11. Now you have mastered something that might be a good launching pad to start a new profession that you really love and care about. Remember, in the age of technology, age is a number. You can start learning anything anytime without spending money; that’s the good side of technology. There are plenty of bad sides, but you’ll be going to be aware of them, isn’t it?
  12. To learn anything new, all you need is a computer and an Internet connection.
  13. Always try to save 40 to 50 percent of the money you are earning. Is there any relation between impulse and savings? Yes, everything is related to our life.
  14. Imagine a situation where you have done something out of impulse and now you’re trying to rectify it, you’re trying to focus more on your living and find that without taking the voluntary unemployment you cannot do that. Your savings might come to your help at that time to give you enough time to settle in your new role.
  15. Finally, last but not least; remember the rule number one before taking any decision.

The Tantrik


The Tantrik

The Tantrik

I couldn’t put my car in the old garage anymore. The owner had suddenly decided to buy a car; so I had to find a new place to shift my car.
One of my friends helped me with a good suggestion. In their locality, people put their car on the roadside; local club charged a few amounts which was much less than the garage rent. It was safe and secure too. I agreed instantly, it seemed to me as a good idea, although I didn’t know what a bizarre experience lay in wait for me.
In the distance was a solitary building. An old structure and the appearance of the roof was fearsome; it looked like it might fall in any time. Trees grew on the wall. An old signboard, discolored, hung precariously; an advertisement of a tantrik astrologer.
Beside that ramshackle building, there was a duck pond. A small playing ground.
I liked the place for a different reason. On the opposite side of the road, there was a tap which was connected to the main supply of the local water system. I decided to come in the evening and wash the car; I always loved to keep my car shining.
One day between the end of the afternoon and night, when the sun was going down, and on the east, a faint moon was appearing, I met the man; he lived in that building. He came to take water.
An old man, indeed. His loincloth dyed with red ochre; a flowing white beard covered his chest. He stopped near the tap and asked me, “Would you like to take it first.” He showed his two pots and said, “It will take time, I think.”
I said, “No problem, please you take. I have no hurry.”
He smiled, “Well said, my son, we should we hurry? After all, we all would end up in one place, sometime before or after!”
I noticed that he was struggling to take the pot filled up with water, it was heavy for his age. I wanted to lend my hand and said, “Let me carry it to your house. Please give it to me.”
He smiled, “No way, my son, without recourse to self-help I cannot live. In fact, I have no hurry, too!”
I had never heard any old man laugh like that – a real belly laugh. I liked him, it was instant and I felt a strange attraction.
We met quite frequently. Whenever he saw me in the evening, he came out and we had long chat. His life-story was very interesting – his wife died while giving birth to his only son. His brother-in-law had been childless, so he decided to adopt the mother-less child.
He said, “I didn’t like the domestic life anymore. I renounced the world and traveled the whole country in search of peace. I met many hermits in strange places and found most of them were fraud, they take red ochre to deceive people, for earning their living.”
He stopped, took a deep breath and continued, “At last, I found a true hermit, my GURU in a burning ghat of Varanasi. I stayed with him for nearly forty years and traveled to everywhere, Nepal, Bhutan, in the distant snow-covered valleys of the Himalayas. He was a true hermit. He could turn dead to life, I saw in my own eyes. He could disappear completely but stayed with you, you could feel his presence. I still feel his presence around me, he said, we don’t die, we only change our appearance, we started from zero and end up at zero. Nothing stays, money, fame, greed, hunger for more power…nothing, my boy.”
One evening he took me to his room. In his past domestic-life, he was a professor of philosophy, the room was staffed with books. There was no cot, except a chair. On the floor, there was a skin of a tiger and a skull was placed in the middle. A skeleton stood in the corner; as if it was watching us.
I didn’t like the atmosphere. He requested me to take the seat. I said in a dried voice, “It’s okay. I am fine.”
He sat on the skin of the tiger and said, “My son bought the chair. He comes pretty often to know whether his old father is dead or not. I told him, I will never die. I will come again and again in this world.”
“Your son, what he does for a living?”
“He is a doctor, staying in a distant place. Although he has a doctor friend living near, a nice person, he takes care of me.”
“But, how do you contact your son?”
“I have his number written in this diary and he bought me a mobile. But, I can’t operate it, I always request somebody to connect.” He burst into laughter.
I thought I had never seen such a jolly, old fellow in my life. Probably he found peace in this strange indifferent world.
He stood up and said, “Come, see my four faithful followers.”
We entered the next room and I was shocked, blood patches, and bones were strewn across the floor. In the dark, I saw four pairs of shining eyes, watching us intently.
He threw pieces of meat across the floor and the four black cats came out from the dark, they made a strange sound, took their daily hunt and disappeared in the dark.
I had enough for a day and I wanted to go home.
Coming outside, I breathed and decided not to go inside that room again.
After a few days, one of my colleagues invited me to his marriage and I came back late at night to park the car. I was in hurry to go home. I locked my car, took the bag and started walking. Suddenly, I heard a call.
“My son!”
I looked back and saw him standing on the doorway. He looked pale in the faint moonlight.

The Tantrik and Other Stories

Please Don’t Close the Doors


Don’t close the doors
Maybe someone saw possibilities which didn’t occur to her; the worst of all possibilities – death’s untimely visit. So it didn’t occur.
Maybe and may not be.
However, whether it occurs or not, possibilities remain endless, really endless; as death is a short night followed by endless day. And that is the reason, why you shouldn’t stop, shouldn’t allow the negative thinking pour into your heart.
When you stop at the doors set in the imaginary walls of possibilities, please try to open them; with empathy, with love, with utmost care. Being a good loser is always better than ending your life as a bad loser.
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Philosophers, thinkers, and writers always have tried to explain this life.
Some of them searched the meaning and emphasized the importance of beingness and nothingness, at the same time.
Shakespeare asked, to be or not to be. Albert Camus believed self-destruction was one of the main crises in our life. Jean-Paul Sartre stressed on nothingness and said; one “beingness” invites many “nothingness”. When someone says “yes”, there are many “nos” in the background.

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